Moving on
by trenchcoatangelss
Summary: Years after the events of The Last Of Us, Ellie goes to visit an old friend. I honestly have no idea how this came about. It's just a short drabble. Hope you like it!


**T** he fence was overgrown with ivy. Thick, green tendrils weaved in and out of the diamond-like spaces making the crisscross pattern disappear. The metal was rusted over, becoming a dark shade similar to - _not now_. She shook the thought out of her head. She didn't have time for this. Hooking her fingers through wasn't pleasant as jagged metal dug into her hands. _Should have worn gloves_ , she could hear him say, _You know better._

"I know, old man," she huffed, heaving herself over the top. A growl sounded in response, followed by a few moans and footsteps. In the distance, she thought she could hear gunshots and motors humming. Stealing herself, she glanced back and saw no one was chasing her. Unfortunately, that didn't calm the thumping in her chest. Nowhere was safe anymore.

 _Do not jump down. Too risky. What happens if you sprain something?_

Sure, the fence was high, but she'd be fine. Compared to everything else, this was a cake. Wait, a cake or a cake walk? Which way did it go?

 _Did you hear me? I said don't._

She sighed and started scaling down the other side. "Yeah, I heard you. Fine, have it your way. If I get eaten, it's on you!" When she finally hit solid ground again she looked down at her hands. It was worse than she'd thought before. A few cuts were bleeding, and they all stung like hell. She slung her pack off her back and started rifling through it for any makeshift bandage materials. A roll of gauze and some tape later, she looked ready to be in a boxing ring.

Ladies and Gentleman, weighing in at 115 pounds from Boston Mass, we give you Ellie the Infected!

 _Get moving._

"Jeez, I was having a moment." She squared up and punched the air, smiling to herself.

 _You're late, anyway. It'll be dark soon._

"Shit! I know, I know, I'm going!" She ran through the instructions in her head. Her earlier encounter back on the road had forced her to take a detour down several blocks, a few alleys, and over the fence. Taking that into account she was...extremely lost. Scanning the road in front of her, she figured her best bet would be to take a left and head back close toward where she was before she was ambushed. Damn hunters still managed to survive the apocalypse, and it seemed like there was more and more of them every day. Where were these people coming from if the whole world ended?

 _It's best not to wonder that, baby girl._

And she knew he was right.

 **. . .**

It took an hour of backtracking, but she finally reached a familiar stretch of road. She recognized the sad and beat up chevy impala sitting in front of a looted bookstore.

"Good to see you, beautiful. It's been a long time and...I'm talking to a car," laughing, she spun around, "Can you believe this shit, J-" She swallowed a lump in her throat. No one was behind her, she knew that, but she'd turned anyway. "Keep it together, Ellie. You're fine. You're better than fine. You're Ellie the Infected, and you're almost home free."

Focusing her attention back to the street, she picked up the pace until she was jogging. Worn down black trainers slapped the pavement underneath her feet. She guessed she was two hours away, and she'd run the whole way there. The sooner she got there, the sooner she'd be able to breathe again.

 _You're making a lot of noise._

"I'm fine."

 _Okay, you're fine. That doesn't change how much noise you're making._

Aside from the sound of her breathing and footfalls, it was eerily silent.

"Do you think they're still alive?" She whispered.

 _Ellie…_

She stopped running and doubled over, breathing hard.

"What the fuck am I doing here," She placed her hands over her face and exhaled hard. "Where the fuck am I going? Risking my life to go someplace that may or may not still be there. And for what? Who says this stupid place is still standing? _What the hell am I doing?"_

 _Stop yelling._

"What?" She hadn't even realized she'd raised her voice.

 _Stop. Yelling. Listen._

There it was. The unmistakeable sound of clicking. She could see the outline of a Clicker down the street. No, not one. Five.

 _Now haul ass._

 **. . .**

She'd killed infected before, so many that she'd lost count. She tried not to think about who they were before they turned, but more than once she'd failed. The first time was with Sam. The second was two years ago, when a little girl around the age of 8 came charging at her with blood streaked around her mouth and a Hello Kitty t-shirt on. She'd shot the girl without even flinching. It didn't scare her killing infected, it scared her how easy it had become. She'd been feeling numb for a while, almost as if her humanity was gone.

When Tommy's Dam came into view, for a moment it felt like none of that mattered. It looked the same as when she'd left, and somehow that ached. The closer she got, the more afraid she became. What if they were all dead, what if they didn't recognize her, or what if it was over run with clickers?

 _It won't be. It can't be._

"Fuck it, then," she told herself, "Let's make whatever's in there here me." She took a deep breath, looked at the gate guarding the compound. That was good, right? It was closed!

"HELLO," She yelled. "Tommy, anyone, are you in there? It's Ellie!"

Nothing. A small part of her wanted to give up and cut her loses. Get the hell away, maybe go hole up in an abandoned hotel for the night knowing she gave it her best shot. A larger part of her got pissed.

"Will some asshole open up and let me into this fucking damn?!"

Laughter then. Someone was _laughing_ at her. It had been a long time since she'd heard anything like that. Finally, the doors swung open. Tommy, an older, more gray Tommy, walked out to greet her clutching his stomach. "Well damn, I wasn't sure it was you at first. Then I remembered, no one cusses like Ellie."

 _I told you._

She ran to him, throwing her arms around him. He smelled like grime and sweat, but it was still Tommy. That was all that mattered.

"You look so much like-" She was cut off by Maria, Tommy's wife, coming and scooping her up into a tighter hug.

"Ellie!" She exclaimed. When she smiled the lines around her mouth were deep. "You're all bones," she chided. "Come inside and we'll get you something to eat!"

At that moment, her stomach growled obnoxiously loud.

"You better get her in quick, I'd say every Clicker within a mile heard that."

She wasn't going to turn down a free meal. When the doors shut behind her and she looked around she saw a thriving community, and it was the most emotional she'd felt in a long time. Kids playing and laughing, people walking around without glancing over their shoulders every second, and her. Dirt no doubt streaked her face, blood showed through her bandages, torn shirt, ripped jeans; she looked so out of place among all the happy faces.

"Tommy, this is amazing," she breathed, awestruck.

"What? This?" He grinned, "It's nothing big yet. Just wait. Give us another year."

 **. . .**

Maria and Tommy had been more than generous. Ellie ate her way through a can of beans and three cans of peaches before she was stuffed. On her last can, Maria had excused herself to go make sure things were running smoothly. Now it was just her and Tommy.

"So, where have you been?" He asked, trying to sound casual. He wasn't very good it, and she wondered if it was a family trait. "After what happened you just...took off."

Ellie sighed. She really didn't want to have this conversation, but it was inevitable.

"I guess I just needed some time. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left the way I did."

"You," he paused, his eyes looking over her dirty face. "Look at you, you're a beautiful woman now. God, how long has it been?"

"Twelve years," she answered, "I hung around rural areas for a while. Been keeping to myself, mostly. There's not a lot of good people left out there."

"So why come back now?"

"I miss him," her voice broke. "And I...it's my birthday. Or, or it was a month or two ago. It's hard to keep place of dates anymore. But I figure, he owes me a present and I was just so mad and I promised I'd come see him and-" She couldn't stop. Words were spilling out so fast, and then tears. So many tears it felt like the whole dam had broken and was spilling down her face. "I miss Joel. I miss him so much sometimes I can barely breathe. I turn around and I think he's there. I hear him in my head, telling me what to do. Bastard never leaves my side, not even now."

Her hands felt warm, and through her tears she could she Tommy had put his hands on hers. "You...you look so much like him," she whispered.

A small smile came to his lips, "I know. I look like an old, angry man."

She couldn't help it, she laughed. Soon they were both laughing so hard they could barely breathe. They fell off their chairs, sharing memories and laughing. When it got quiet, Tommy added, "The best man I ever knew." She looked at him and said, "And the only father I ever had." Then it was quiet again, but she could tell it was different.

"Can I see him?"

 **. . .**

He's where he was when she left. She sits in front of him, eyes welling with tears. There's no headstone, but a small cross shaped marker made out of twigs and jammed into the earth. When Ellie looks close she can see someone carved 'Joel' into the thicker of the two sticks. A fresh looking flower is next to it, and she wonders who put it there. Maybe Tommy or Maria.

"Joel," she whispers. "I came back."

 _I know,_ she can hear him saying.

She breaks down, placing her head in her hands. "I'm sorry it took so long."

 _It's okay, baby girl._

"I'm so scared. I haven't stopped being scared since the day you died. I wish you wouldn't have gone on that stupid supply run. I wish you wouldn't have took me with you. I wish you wouldn't have tried to help me fight off one of those fucking monsters when you know I can't get infected. You always had to be the fucking hero and now...now you're gone and I...I want to be with you." She punches the earth beside her and feels blood well up under the bandages, but it doesn't matter now. Nothing feels like it matters anymore.

 _Don't say that._

"I'm all alone, Joel. I've been so alone."

 _You don't have to be._

"Yes I fucking do. Everyone I get close to dies. First Riley, then Tess, and you. I don't want to get anyone else killed. I was supposed to be the girl with the cure, but all I am is cursed."

 _No, you're not._

"I don't know, Joel. I should get out of here. I should leave this place and never look back, but I can't. I can't leave you again. I can't be out there alone. I'm not strong enough. I can't just endure and survive."

 _There's more to life than just surviving._

"I love you, Joel."

But this time, when she listens for his voice, there's nothing there.

Ellie smiles, stands up, and goes to find Tommy.


End file.
